Adventures in Polyamory
I'm Kitten, a Neutral Good pansexual poly pagan geek mom living in Seattle, actively searching for new ideas and new connections. I'm a strange mix of experienced and n00b when it comes to poly; I've been actively living the poly lifestyle since 1997, but have lived in mostly small towns, and have kindof stumbled into partners by accident. I have never experienced a poly community...until very recently. This has opened up a whole new world to me, as well as new pitfalls that I'd never been aware of. Join me as I chronicle my journey into this incredibly rewarding lifestyle.
Note: Nicknames or initials will always be used in this blog. If you think you know who I'm referring to, DO NOT call them out by name or use identifying characteristics.
"A slut is a person of any gender who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you." -Dossie Easton
Hang on…lemme chain the doors shut.
There! I love a captive audience.
I’m in my mid-thirties, am married, have a young child, and have been practicing the poly lifestyle since 1997. However, I’ve lived in mostly small towns, and was never really aware that there was a larger poly community until very recently.
All of my poly relationships up until that discovery were either stumbled into accidentally (and often the only real thing we had in common was our poly status), or were long-distance and internet-based.
Several months ago, I discovered that a long-time friend of mine was poly, and we’d just never shared that information with each other. Through her Facebook feed and a string of comments on a post, I learned that there was a secret Facebook group of poly people in Seattle, the nearest metro area…and when asked if I wanted to join, leaped at the chance.
A whole new world opened up to me.
Through that group, I began to instantly make friends, and to learn that there were MANY other people who believed as I did, that love was infinite, and that sharing that love multiplied rather than diminished it.
Drake (my husband) and I had always shared a dream of building a poly family. We had no idea what that family would look like, whether it meant adding another woman to our family, another couple, or he and I each finding other partners separately. All we knew is that we wanted that interconnectedness, and we were fine with letting new relationships find their own balance within that.
The discovery of that group, and of the poly community in Seattle, was life-changing for us.
We have since decided to move to Seattle, and a large part of that decision is the opportunities available to us there within the poly community, both romantic and not.
This blog will chronicle that journey, the trials and joys, the peaks and valleys, in the hopes that what I learn on the way will be helpful to others.
Enjoy!
Oh, I suppose I should let you guys out, now, huh?
UPDATE December 2011: A lot has happened since I originally wrote this introduction. Rather than revise it, I’ve decided to add a note here with new information.
I am no longer with my husband. For details, check out posts, but as of December 2011, I am a single mom attempting to navigate the poly lifestyle. This is a completely different paradigm for me, being poly and unpartnered, and will probably end up actually being even more useful to my readers!
UPDATE June 2012: The first half of 2012 has been just as eventful for me as the final half of 2011 was…but FAR more rewarding. I met and am partnered with a wonderful man, Raven, with a daughter of his own, who I’ll refer to as Chickadee. The current configuration of our polycule: Raven has three partners, I have two. Between the social life and the two munchkins, our lives are very, very full…which means I’ll have plenty to write about!
